Relationships aren’t always rosy, there are times when the storms of life or the flaws of a partner may hit the relationship so hard that it would cause a serious gap between both partners. For most people, this is the point where they throw in the towel in defeat and decide to find love somewhere else, with a more deserving partner or favorable conditions.

Not everyone dares to just throw out years of being together, memories of all the good things the person has done for just one mistake or problem. So they are willing to give the relationship a second chance, one more chance to get it right this time. 

The goal is to use the lesson of the past and build a better future for the relationship. 

But the problem is, how do you ensure you get it right this time around? How can you give this second chance what it needs to do so much better?

Important steps to take to make the second chance in the relationship better

1.  Have that difficult conversation

Do not brush anything under the carpet, you both need to trash the issue that caused the downfall of the first relationship properly.

The guilty person(s) should give in full details about what happened and what did not happen. Why he/she did what they did and how they did it. No stone should be left unturned, ask all the embarrassing questions. If the relationship broke up because one person cheated, then you should ask the person he/she did it and how it happened every step of the way. If the person is embarrassed, that’s a good thing. 

The main reason for this is to help you achieve the next step successfully. So make sure the person tells you every cringing detail of all he/she did so you can know the true size of the problem you have to fix before fully entering into the relationship for a second time.

Relationship problem

2.  Forgive with all your heart

Now that you have heard all that happened, how it happened and why it happened, it’s time to forgive.

Pour out all those anger and betrayal you feel inside. Make sure he/she has an HD view while you are venting out your anger and betrayal. It would show them just how deep their mistake cut right through your heart and soul. 

So purge your heart and soul of every negative energy and when you are done venting, it’s time to forgive the person. 

There is no need to give the relationship a second chance if you can’t find it in your heart to truly forgive. Without truly forgiving, the second chance would be filled with lots of accusations, insecurity, negative energy, and hurtful reminders from the past. 

No relationship can grow well under all these bad elements, so it is paramount that you either forgive completely or you forget about the second chance. 

Read: 22 Lethally Bad Habits That Shouldn’t Be Found In Any Relationship

3.  Fortify the walls of the relationship

Imagine this was a house that got broken on one side, after you have talked with the responsible party, and you have forgiven him/her. The next line of actual would be to repair the damaged area and make some changes to that area so that area will be a little bit stronger.

That’s the same thing that should be done in the relationship. With all the information you got from what happened, how and why, it’s time to put necessary measures in place that would try its best to stop repetition of such occurrence. 

Pick out the lessons from the last problem, look for long-lasting solutions and both of you are to be fully committed to doing all it takes to make this second chance a success.

4.  Do something new and romantic

Before going further, we must know why we have to do this. Remember when the relationship started in the first place, everything felt new, special, and romantic. Those feelings were what paved the foundation of the relationship. 

After the great incident that wrecked the old relationship, it’s only logical that you build the next one on more solid ground.

So, after passing through such a rough time, it’s time to go on new romantic dates and activities. Choose things that would focus on the both of you and grow your love for one another.

Pay more attention to each person’s individual love language and fill their love tank to the brim always.

Romantic second chance

5.  Appreciate each other for the progress so far

This is the most overlooked aspect of a relationship. We tend to forget to be grateful when things are going well.

When you properly appreciate a person for the little he/she did, the person will do more for you. 

When things stay getting rosy in the relationship, remember to appreciate your partner occasionally for all the effort he/she has put in to make this second chance be a success.

You can do this in form of text messages, in person, or romantic surprises. A friend of mine just planned a romantic surprise for her boyfriend recently and it blew his mind.

In all, appreciate the little good things in the relationship and that would pave the work for the bigger greater things.

Read: How To Resolve Conflict In A Relationship With Tender Love

 

Thanks so much for reading, I hope you found it informative and helpful. Drop your thoughts and contributions in the comment section below, I will reply to it all. 

Thanks once again.

5 Comments

  1. Deborah October 18, 2020 at 5:35 am

    I remember years back I cheated on my partner, I told him everything which was going on and we reconciled. But the problem Is that he doesn’t trust me.

    So I want to let go of the relationship

    Reply
    1. LoversBud Editor October 18, 2020 at 5:50 am

      A relationship can not grow without trust. Every move you make will be suspicious to your partner even when you are 100% innocent. At some point, you are bound to get tired of the lack of trust.
      That’s why the number 2 specifically talked about truly forgiving the person.
      You are taking the right step, but when you find love again, don’t let your past mistake of cheating on your partner repeat itself again.

      Good luck, I wish you the best in finding a new loving partner.

      Reply
    2. Ryan Erickson October 18, 2020 at 8:36 am

      Once the trust is broken don’t you feel as though being the one responsible maybe you should allowed time to heal, not for you obviously but ur partner? Instead run away showing no willing to work or show patients for said situation?!

      Reply
  2. Cant say October 22, 2020 at 6:15 pm

    Hi I just wanted to say you have a lot of advise with all kinds of solutions to back it up. Would y be willing to give some 1 0n 1 private advise to a very all kinds of messed up on the iui inside person ? That has no one in life to ask advise from that I truly don’t trust ?

    Reply
    1. LoversBud Editor October 22, 2020 at 8:43 pm

      At this moment, I don’t take in personal questions directly as I am yet to create that platform.
      But for personal questions, you can still ask on the Quora Space using the anonymous feature and I will ask your question personally.

      Reply

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