After all the hassle she put you through before she finally agreed to be your girlfriend, you probably expected her to be a badass chick around you but all of a sudden, instead you noticed she is really shy around you and now you are wondering why is my girlfriend shy around me. 

In this post, I won’t only tell you the most likely reasons why your girlfriend is shy around you, I will also give you possible solutions to stop your girlfriend from being shy around you.

Reasons Why Your Girl Is Still Shy Around You

Here are 4 possible reasons why your girlfriend is shy around you and their solutions.

  1.   You are her first boyfriend 

If you are your girlfriend’s first boyfriend then this is the most likely reason why she is so shy around you. It is very natural for her to be shy already being that she is new to the dating world and has never had a boyfriend before you. 

She may still be feeling awkward because she just stepped out of her comfort zone. Usually, this shyness doesn’t last long and in the space of 1 year, you will have a very chippy and confident girlfriend by your side and her being shy would seem like a distance memory.

Read: Reasons Why You Should Strongly Consider Keeping Your Relationship Private

  1.     Trying to Hide Imperfections:

One of the reasons your girlfriend may be shy around you could be because she thinks you are perfect and she’s not comfortable with showing her imperfect self to you or making mistakes around you. She can be very active and open around her other friends but with you in sight, she freezes up. If that’s so, it’s time to get a bit crazy. Show her your imperfections.


Tell her stories of your most embarrassing moments, your failures, and your insecurities, then ask for hers. The point of all this is to let her know you are also human and filled with imperfections. 

Have a deep conversation with her exchanging deep secrets and then make her understand that individually you both may not be perfect but together, your imperfection becomes one perfect whole.

Then directly ask her to promise you from that moment onward she would try her best to be freer around you.

Shy girlfriend

  1.     Low Self-Confidence

Now there is another possible reason why your girlfriend is shy around you. The reason may be because she lacks self-confidence. This is really a delicate matter because your attitude to her can either make her lose more self-confidence or make her gain it back. 

Here are signs that show she has low self-confidence

  • Difficulty speaking up and prioritizing your own needs, wants, and feelings
  • Saying “I’m sorry” and/or feeling guilty for everyday actions
  • Not feeling deserving of, or capable of, having “more”

You can read more of the signs here: 9 Signs of Low Self-Esteem & 10 Ways Grow Confidence


When you have a girlfriend like this, you have to be careful in making hurtful jokes about her. For example, if she is insecure over her body size and you make hurtful jokes about it, it will cut her deep and would reduce her self-confidence further and make her feel more shy being around you.

But if you pay her more compliments her about her body size, and show her reasons why she is perfect the way she is or helps her achieve the body goal she has, it will eventually get her to love her size and become more self-confident with time which will result to her not being shy around you anymore.

  1.     Naturally shy:

If none of the above reasons matches why she’s shy around you. Then she might just be a naturally shy person. This is especially true for girls who are really smart, they tend to hide inside their shell. Too shy to step out of their comfort zone.


You can decide to accept her for who she is, or you can try to draw her out of her shell slowly by engaging her in activities that would warrant her to step up and express herself more often. Don’t rush her or force her to do anything she doesn’t want to do.

I will advise you to start small, like taking her to places that are private but a little bit public. When she is completely comfortable and isn’t timid in that place, then take her to somewhere more public. Keep repeating until she isn’t shy anymore.

Read: How To Cheer Up Your Girlfriend – 11 Fast Ways To Make Her Happy Again

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